i hadn't found time to write... contented with what that had past by me.. rekindling moments that shouldn't be rekindled..
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i found myself, not obsessed with my new job at all.. work load and practically, i can see that they just need to with the operations side. other than that, i'm just nothing to them. but lucky i've got kris.. she's like the best friend i've only have at work.. i told her what i've been keeping in my heart.. couldn't stop feeling sorry for myself.
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my girlfriend been asking me if i've been reading her blog.. i just wanted to say no - 'i hasn't been reading cos, i don't want like to read about her outings with her friends and boyfriend.' there's nothing about me.. so, i think, i'm no longer her 'bestfriend'.. but, to me she's still my bestfriend and because of that i will pray for her.. then again, she went to hong kong with her mates (which was supposed to be me) and she bought me this beautiful a-line skirt and blazer.. janet keep saying, 'she knows your taste!' - cos, she's my bestfriend..
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other then being not obsessed with work and my girlfriend, i found myself deep in the pool of uncertainty of love.. i've been contacting my ex-bf again.. we went out again.. stayed out the night. and practically didn't talked about why he ditched me the other time. this time there was a consistency of calling and replying of sms and its me who do the calling everytime - every 30mins.. if he missed my calls, he'll only call me back 15mins later.. somehow, i will never be good enough for him.. or is it otherwise.. I DO WANNA MAKE IT RIGHT! am i worth for your love or attention? lets just talk about attention first, love later... are you worth my tears? as, i've been waking up to red sore eyes.. having him is like the best thing, but waiting for him to return my calls, is like the end of the world! he must be smiling like the evil lex luther on smallvile! moron!
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on the lighter note - england LOST (ex-bf fav team)! brazil didn't make it to the finals (malaaz fav team)... now i'm hoping on portugal now, but france has a better chance.. germany have to win as its their home ground.. so, i'm watching the FINALS! the last two group..